The Dairy of a Crazy Lady

Waste my life why don’t you. Not worth nothing to you, or anybody, and I don’t got no body to see me. Wait for no one. Just get on out of here and take me with you so you might drop me at the first chance. Then I will be alone, wandering the black woods with a lost mind and no intent to look for it. Why would I? So I could regain reasoning and search for reality to banish my world I made in my minds absence? But I like my solitude… I like it! Don’t take me from it! It needs me. I have cared for it since I found it when it hobbled upon me like a wounded animal. I have nursed it back to health with all my being, so now it is mine. It owes its life to me and vowed never to leave. It cares for me now. I need it, and it needs me more. Without me it cannot exist. Leave me! You scare him away… If you go now he may still come back. Leave me be before he goes from me forever! Ah, see it has come back at your leave. There now sweet, don’t be scared. Company will not bother us again.

Angry Words

Oh! Pity the day a writer has no story! There is no worse feeling in the world than to be so close to joy, only to be restricted by the apprehension to make it perfect and the lack of perfect ideas!

Curse the cursor, blinking in rapt impatience for words that will not come! Heaven afflict the blank page that will not fill! Even these words are nothing but torment, for they only give me a glimpse of what I could have! These shall not stay with me, but perish by my own hand for they fail to construct the story I bid them to. They laugh at their disobedience and spurn that who is their creator and will-be destroyer. Ignorant fools! Why must you be shadows to that of your counterparts, those words who have created magic, populations, and even entire worlds? Why must you take delight in my suffering?

But of course… It is my suffering that springs you to life. This is why you continue to ail me. You must, or you will face a quicker demise. The more I work, the less chance you have of dying. Selfish creatures! Yet I admire your ruse. It is working. You make me wish to strike you out like the omnipotent God sending his flood! But I have not the strength, at least not so without cause. I cannot kill you, because although I wrote you in anger I love you… And I hate you for it.